Love Breaks Bad

Episode 7 - Totally Not Fair

Sean Alsobrooks Season 1 Episode 7

This episode challenges traditional ideas about religion and explores the concept of radical grace. Sean dives into a scripture story about vineyard workers and explains how it contradicts our human sense of fairness.

Are you ready to ditch the guilt and embrace the good news?

This episode is perfect for:

  • Anyone who grew up in church and is questioning their beliefs
  • People who might like to explore good news instead of bad news
  • Listeners who are curious about the concept of grace

In this episode, you'll learn:

  • Why traditional ideas of fairness clash with God's love
  • How to move beyond religious guilt and shame
  • What it means to receive God's grace

Sean also shares a powerful story about a World War II priest that will challenge your perspective on forgiveness.

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Sean:

I want to start with the disclaimer before we even dig in to this episode that this. Uh, this has a potential to ruffle some feathers and maybe potentially. I don't know, make you angry. Especially if you're a church person, if you're a church person. Some of what I'm about to say is a. Well, you're not, I don't know. You're not going to like it. You should love it. But you're not going to like it because it goes against church and religion and the current of Christianity and all the things we've been conditioned to understand about who God is and what he cares about. Uh, flies in the face of that. But it's the truth. And it's the good news. And with that, disclaimer, let's get started. Life is not fair. I remember growing up. Sometimes you'd be in a little pickle as a kid. Like, you know, your brother would take her toy or your sister would steal your snack or whatever it might be. You complained to your parents? I remember on occasion, my mom or dad would say something like, Hey, life's not fair. Figure it out, kid. Life's not fair. I remember thinking of that, but I always knew as a kid, somehow deep inside, I knew from like what I learned in church and about God and the Bible that somehow. The one thing I unequivocally knew was that there was one eternal constant one unshakable truth that God is at least fair. God is just all right. Well, Maybe. I want to share a story of scripture. At Jesus shares. It's a story about workers and it's found in Matthew 20 and, um, Well, let me just read it to you. It says this. God's kingdom is like an estate manager. Again, this is Jesus sharing. God's kingdom was like an estate manager who went out early in the morning to hire workers for his vineyard. They agreed on a wage of a dollar a day and went to work later about nine o'clock. The manager saw some other men hanging around the town square unemployed. He told him to go work in his vineyard and he would pay them a fair wage. They went. He did the same thing at noon. And again, at three o'clock. At five o'clock. He went back and found still others standing around and he said to them, why are you standing around all day? Doing nothing? They said because no one hired us. He told him to go work in his vineyard. When the day's work was over the owner of the vineyard, instructed his foreman, call the workers in and pay them their wages. Start with the last hired and go onto the first. Those hired at five o'clock came up and were each given a dollar. When those who were hired first saw that they assume they would get far more, but they got the same each one of them. A dollar taking the dollar. They groused angrily to the manager. These last workers put in only one easy hour and you just made them equal to us who slaved all day on her scorching sun. He replied to the one speaking for the rest friend. I haven't been on fair. We agreed on the wage of a dollar didn't we? So take it and go. I decided to give to the one who came last, the same as you can't. I do what I want with my own money. Are you going to get stingy? Because I am generous. Here. It is again, the great reversal, many of the first. Indian not blast. And the last first. Youth. That's one of those parables that man. It's a little bit hard to chew on. Uh, it just doesn't seem fair. Talking about fairness life isn't fair. Well, there you go. Life. Isn't fair for the workers that started early, put it in a full day. Got the same reward. How dare that vineyard owner? Jesus says the kingdom of God is how he starts. The kingdom of God is like this. So, what does that mean? How do we relate to that? Why does God even hire these unqualified workers? I mean, that's insulting enough that they're not, they're the lazy people that sit around all day doing nothing. And then he treats them all the same. He pays them all the same. That's just not right. Where's the sense of justice in that? Most of us can relate, especially if you're a church person, you can relate with the angry workers you've put in your time. You paid your dues. You've obeyed you follow the rules you felt bad about when you didn't follow the rules you felt super bad about when you super didn't follow the rules. You've had this guilt that's hung over you. This sacred guilt. Right. How dare, how dare the vineyard owner give everyone the same reward? But Jesus, again says the kingdom of God is like this. Loving everyone sort of, you know, you talk about loving everybody. God is love, love people. It's this great sort of idea or concept. It's again in a lot of our worship songs. If you're a church person you've heard love, love, love, love, love, love, but man, I tell you what, when you really get down to it. When you get down to brass tacks, so to speak. It really contradicts our sense of fairness. Doesn't it love. That's not fair. Grace that's fair. Like we love at the same time. We love this idea of grace and mercy. And God's overwhelming. Goodness. And at the same time, it's man, it's not right how dairy. It kinda makes us a little bit angry. We like it, but it makes us nervous. The reward was given based on the owner's generosity. I think about that, not by measuring how much each worker accomplished. Huh. That's interesting. The kingdom of God has no merit system, if you will. Right. That's where we get out of this. That's what I understand. Like when I read this, Jesus says the kingdom is like this. It means that there's no merit system. You're not rewarded for your achievement. Let me say that again. Cause it's a pretty scary if you're a church person. This is scary. This is this, I don't know. Listen, you're not going to like this. I gave you a disclaimer up front. So if you're continuing to listen, that's how I knew. You are not rewarded or favored. Or. Smiled upon based upon your achievement. Based upon your goodness based upon your Bible study time, your prayer time. Based upon what you do or don't do. There's no extra reward for you. There's no merit system in the kingdom. You're not even rewarded for your special, sacred guilt. When you feel so terrible. This is the good news. It might seem like crazy news of your third person and unfair, but let me, let me just take you through why this is amazing news because in Jesus, God has canceled the whole silly game of guilt for lack of interest on his part. That's why the gospel is called good news. But again, It can get a little sounding too much like good news. Like it's sounding a little dangerous, this idea of grace, this concept that. You can do whatever you want and God will still love you and forgive you and art in fact already has, right? Like, I don't know. Sometimes. Church, we sort of codified in. Categorize and break it down so much over so many centuries that we know everything we take away, all the. Mysticism, all the beauty, all the spirit, all the intent. Tangible stuff out of it. And we've broken it down into rules and laws and doctrines. At theology. And. It's this sort of little safe little puppy week in hold. Right. We know all about it. We know how to control it. We know the ins and the outs. We know how to make it behave. But what if it's not, what of grace is much more dangerous than that? I think it is because you can see here, even me, I'm a recovering church person. I grew up in this and I'm still unwinding from it. Unconditioning. From it for all these years. And it's still, there's a small sense of me where I understand it threatens our values in our senses. Right. Because we have this. Concept that we've been conditioned to believe we are rewarded according to what we achieve. All right. That's how it works at school to how it works at work. That's how it works in sports. That's how it works in church. You'll be rewarded according to how hard you work and what you achieve. And suddenly grace says that's not true. There's no merit system. And it starts to get a little shaky under our feet starts to feel a little wobbly, like, wait, what? That's not a fair. That's not fair. Yeah. Life's not fair. That's one of my mom and dad used to say. Oh, by the way, what I grew up in the eighties and what an eighties thing to say. Like how to solve a problem for a kid, you know, Hey, figure it out. Life's not fair. Anyway, how can God be so irresponsible, so erratic and so unfair. I don't know to me, like the good news is very intriguing and I love it. I'm drawn to this, like, Even the nervousness of it is like amazing. But I think there's a sense sometimes. Like it's almost too good. Like maybe God will take it back. Maybe he'll change his mind. Maybe there is a line that we can push that's a little too far. Maybe this lavish amazing wonder is grace is. Uh, somehow secretly limited, maybe there's an asterisk or a footnote that we're missing. There has to be right, because it just doesn't seem right. The world doesn't work that way. Yeah, the world doesn't work that way. We're not talking about our world. We're talking about God's kingdom. That's the beauty of it. I had this understanding growing up and maybe you kind of late, maybe you're still here. If you sin too much. If you fail too often. God will start to decide to take his grace back his love back. You sort of put in time out. Of course, he still loves you, right? Because deep down we know God is love, but. Man. You're out of sorts. You're in time out, you're in the penalty box, so to speak. Which is interesting. There's a scripture I want to share with you. It's. From the book of Romans it's chapter eight. And, uh, maybe it will point us. Uh, in a different direction, maybe there isn't a penalty box. Maybe there isn't a time-out. It says this. What do you think with God on our side like this? How can we lose? If God didn't hesitate to put everything on the line for us embracing our condition. Exposing himself to the worst by sending his own son. Is there anything else he wouldn't gladly and freely do for us and who would dare tangle with God by messing with one of God's chosen who would dare even to point a finger? The one who died for us, who was raised to life for us as in the presence of God. At this very moment, sticking up for us. Do you think anyone is going to be able to drive a wedge between us and Christ love for us? There is no way. Not trouble, not hard times. Not hatred, not hunger, not homelessness, not threats, not backstabbing. Not even the worst sins listed in scripture. None of this phases us because Jesus loves us. I'm absolutely convinced. The scripture says that nothing, nothing living or dead angelic or demonic today or tomorrow higher, low thinkable, unthinkable. Absolutely nothing. Absolutely nothing. It can get between us and God's love because of the way that Jesus. Our master has embraced us. That's what scripture says. That's Romans chapter eight. But man. I mean, that's amazing, right? Like literally Jesus is there sticking up for us. Nothing can get between us because of the way God has embraced us and loved us in Jesus. It's good news. It's wonderful news, but somehow it's like, it gets watered down somehow. Th there are attachments to that. There are rules and asterisks and footnotes and things that, yeah, that is good. We all know that's good, but don't push it. Don't push it. What if people get crazy, what do people go nuts? What if people just lose their minds? People do that anyway. We have permission in full autonomy to do whatever we want. Anyway, God still loves us. But dude, that's. Why would you want to do that? You wouldn't send, definitely has consequences. It's terrible thing. It wrecks our relationships. It can ruin our lives. There are real, tangible. Consequences of our choices. Absolutely. But it doesn't. Affect one ounce, how God loves us and embraces us. Not one ounce has an effect that. We don't earn it. There's no achievement. I think that's really powerful. In modern language, I would translate the scripture to sort of say something like he loves us when we don't deserve it. He loves us when we don't learn it. And he loves us when we don't even want him to. He loves us when we don't even pay attention to them. He loves us when we don't act like Christ followers. He loves us when our lives are a mess. He loves us when we hurt. He loves us. When we hurt others, he loves us. Nothing gets in the way of that. He's already proclaimed it. It says in scripture that behold talking about Jesus behold here is the lamb of God who takes away the sins of the world. And I wonder sometimes. If we really believe that. It takes away the sins of the world. Most sense. The the, the not too bad since. 99% of sense, but there is that light. Nope. All the sense. That's what scripture says again. Some of the stuff you can get mad at me, or you can get mad at scripture or you can get mad at God, or you can get mad at the whole, I don't know. You can just be mad. You can be upset. But this is what the gospel is. This is what the good news is. To me, there's many examples of God's unfair love, but one of the most blatant ones. One of the most crazy ones in scripture is when Jesus is on the cross. Scripture tells us that he's put on a cross. And he's crucified in next to him are, are a couple of, uh, thief's criminals that are also being crucified, right? The difference of course is he's perfect. He's God in the flesh. And these are criminals that according to Roman law have earned their punishment. Their punishment on this day is crucifixion. Right. And I just picture that thief on the cross. The story plays out in a very strange way. You talk about unfairness. Think about this for a second. He's guilty. Think of yourself as the, as the, the, these guilty, you know, it you're out in the cross. I mean, you've done the crime. The law was fair. The judgment's been pronounced. The trial happen. The sentence has been proclaimed. That's fair, right? There's no more chances. No more appeals. There's no more hope on this day. Literally you're hanging on a Roman cross. But next to him, is this guy named Jesus? You get the sense that he wasn't treated fairly. Everyone knew that the thief belong there fair and square, but Jesus man, this guy seemed like a good guy, but here he is on the cross. The world's upside down when it's even happening on this day. You know, you don't deserve it, but you scream out as a thief. Remember me? That's what scripture says that these shouts out to Jesus in this last ditch hope of maybe this guy is the Messiah. Maybe Jesus is God. Maybe there's something left for me to hang on to or grasp onto. And he says, remember me, help me. Have mercy on me, right. Imagine what the thief was thinking. What did I just say? My life is over. My luck has run out. But this guy next to me, I feel something. I sent something. As a thief, you know, you deserve what you get. And here you are asking him. For mercy. To take you with him to, to rescue you wherever it is that he's going. This is crazy. You probably think, I don't know much about God. I don't know. That God is just, God is fair. Right. But wait a minute. Jesus starts to say something. The scripture tells us that Jesus says to the thief. Through all his pain. All this stress, all the anxiety. Everything that's been put upon him in this moment. He looks to the thief and he says, I tell you the truth. Today. You'll be with me in paradise. How. Utterly. Absolutely. Unfair is that. That guy needs to get what he earned. But he doesn't. She cries out to Jesus. And Jesus says you're good. Bro. You're good. I got you. Right. If you think according to church in religion, This is so jacked up. This is so not right. I mean, come on. I at least at a minimum. Okay, maybe we get to the point at the end of the story with a thief. Is forgiven and brought into paradise, brought in to be with God. Maybe we get there, but first at a minimum, There's some hoops we need to jump through. There's some check boxes. That must be checked. Number one. Shouldn't he be. At least been asked to repent. I don't see any repentance on his part. Dairy. Or how about this? How about a sermon? Or lecture right. Or teaching. Uh, okay. I'm going to forgive you this last time again. But you're going to sit down and you're going to hear from me why you're so wrong. Nope. You don't get that. You don't get this demand for repentance. You don't get this behavior change. He doesn't even have an opportunity for behavior change. Jesus just Ashers this man into the kingdom. Come on in brother. I got you. You're good. How absolutely utterly unfair. Yeah. That's called grace. That's called the kingdom. That's the good news. Is it scandalous? Absolutely. Does it make you nervous? Absolutely. Is the way the world works. Absolutely not. Coming back to the story at the beginning about the workers. It's incredible, really how the land owner seems to want or even need every one. Every last one of the people in the town, he keeps going back and finding more and more and more, bring them back, bring them back, bring them back. Bring them back and reward them, bring them back and reward them. Whether they've earned it or not even like, again, the eager beavers in the morning up ready to work. Sure. Bring them in. People at lunch, I just want to work a half day. Bring them in. The people at the very end that I slept in all day that were up partying all night. That did all the nasty things that the church people don't like and despise bring them in. Pay him the same. I mean, really think about that. Who hires unfit on qualified workers? Five minutes before the day is over. Who does that? Jesus does that. Does that disrupt your sense of fairness? If it does, I get it. But man, there's something beautiful in it. Jesus keeps going back and going back and going back. The store reveals the very heart of God. Again, Jesus starts the story with saying the kingdom of God. Is like this. It's not just a story that we add or. It's like a little addition to the bigger story he literally says, the kingdom of God is like this. Yeah. If you spend any time around church or religion, It looks, nothing like that. Starting to see the picture here. Maybe the kingdom of God and the things Jesus cares about are not the same as Christianity. In this culture, this current of church. To me. The more I learn, the more I discover. The more, I unlearn really the more I listen and discover the beautiful truth of Jesus, the scandalous stories of Jesus. The more I lean in with faith to this good news of grace. I see. How absolutely different. The priorities are in God's kingdom and in man's kingdom. It's incredible. This outrageous scandalous love of Jesus. It is. The gospel of good news. It is grace. I was talking with my daughter Ellington. The other night. And she was getting, she had watched this video that came up on YouTube and it was this pastor and it was the typical story of church and Christianity and how you better get right. And how you better stop this and how you better turn. And if you don't do this, you don't know God. If you don't dig in, you don't know God, if you don't care and want to grow and seek and become more and more, you don't know, you don't care about God, you don't. God is. You're separated. You're all of these things, all this condemnation all again. Not good news, bad news. I told her, does that feel like good news to you? I could see it on her face. She was almost at the point of tears. This pressure, this anxiety. She's not doing enough. God's going to be disappointed. I said, does it feel a good news? She said no. Doesn't it, it feels like bad news. I sat exactly. My warning, my guideline, I guess maybe is a better way to say is like, If, whatever you're hearing from church, your pastor. Your Bible study. Your book. Your podcasts. Your interpretation of scripture, even if it's not good news, if it doesn't. Uh, in, in this, over the top. Crazy bordering on insanity. Good news. If it's not scandalous, you're not getting it. It's not right. The gospel. Is good news. It should make you smile. It should make you shake your head and wonder. It is good news. If it doesn't do that, you've watered it down. You've restricted it and restrained it and held it up to this pile of stuff. I love laws of rules, theology, doctrine, church culture. Oh, whatever, fill in the bucket. I want the good news. I'm at the point where I only want the good news, I will settle for nothing less and it is scary and I've had to unlearn a lot and I still have this voice at the back of my head. You can't go that far. It can't be that good. Yeah. But yeah, but yeah, but yeah, but yeah, but all freaking day long, If you grown up in church, you know what I'm talking about? Yeah, this sounds good. But. Yeah, I would love people unconditionally, no strings attached, but at some point we got to help them change their behavior. Do we, is that your job? Uh, or is that the holy Spirit's job?'cause last time I checked. God's really good at what he does. He doesn't need us to change anybody's behavior. He doesn't need us to condemn or pass judgment on anybody. He needs us to extend the same grace and the same mercy in the same forgiveness that he's given to us extended. That's the only thing we have to do. That's what following Jesus does. Followers of Jesus followed Jesus. You do. And you go. To the places he went to you care about the things he cares about. He cares about grace. He cares about inclusion. He cares about justice. He cares about the week. Being seen. Incredible outrageous and scandalous. That's the gospel of good news. I'm going to share a story. There's a story I heard years ago. And it takes place in world war II. So picture yourself in the second world war, a group of soldiers are fighting. In the countryside of France and then during a tense battle. One of their soldiers. One of the American soldiers with them is killed. As friends don't want to leave his body on the battlefield. And they decided to give him a Christian burial. It's the last. Least they could do. And so they remembered a church, a few miles behind the front lines. Who's grounds included a small cemetery surrounded by a white fence. After receiving permission to take their friend's body to the cemetery, they set out for the church arriving there just before sunset and a priest. Is there. He's older. You could tell he's been there many years and he answers the door when they knock. His face is deeply wrinkled the tan. And they say to him, our friend was killed in battle. And we want to give him a church burial. Apparently the priests understood what they were asking. Although he spoke. Very little English. He says, I'm sorry, but we can only bury those of the same faith here. Weary after many months of war, the soldiers simply turned to walk away. But the old priests calls after them, you can bury him outside the fence. Cynical and exhausted at this point, the soldiers. Dig a grave and bury the friend just outside the white fence of the church. They finished after dark and the next morning, the entire unit was ordered to move on back to the front lines. And the group race back to the church for one final goodbye to their friend. When they arrive something strange happened though, they couldn't find the grave that they just buried. Him in, but then just Doug last night. They're retired and confused. They knocked on the door of the church. And they asked the old priest, if he knew where they had buried their friend, It was dark last night and we were exhausted. We must've been disoriented. They said. I smile flashed across the old priest face. After you left last night, I could not sleep. So I went outside early this morning. He said, And I moved the fence. I love that story. That's a story of grace. That's a story. I have the kingdom. God moves the fence. We don't get in the fence. We don't earn the fence. We don't get over the fence. God. Has moved the fence once. And for all, for everybody. But one thing I do know. One thing I understand is that fence makers do not like their fences torn down and moved. They don't like it. We know what we know. We stand on stable ground. We start moving fences and you start letting everybody in things get weird and unshakable and you can't track it. And it's hard to like keep track of everybody's, uh, achievements when you start moving fences. Right. You can get a good sense of what people need to hear. I've learned by what they're most afraid of hearing. And oftentimes for church people. What they seem to be most afraid of hearing is a notion of unqualified forgiveness. Just pure grace. It's just too much. Good news. It's just too good to be true. Exclamation point. It's just too much. It's just not right. Faith. Not works. Is the good news faith not works. Grace, not merit. God not you.. Clearly paints the picture that God has one single solitary unchanging stance towards us. Is that he loves us. He's crazy about us. Just as we are, just how we are. He's already pronounced that he doesn't love as a win. We do these things or check these boxes. We're score this. Hi on a test or when we have our church, a Tejas loves us. He's not keeping score. Jesus isn't keeping score. He doesn't insist on his pound of flesh. He doesn't go after centers with a stick. Instead he forgives and Jesus on the cross is the final word on the subject from God. It's done. It is finished. You might be thinking. I just don't know if I can believe that. I don't know if I believe that. Am I thought to you is you could decide to. You could decide to really believe. The good news. It's a choice. And it's called faith. Let's keep the good news. The good news. Let it be scandalous. Let it be over the top. Let it be almost too good to even believe. But if you decide to. I'd like to welcome you in.